BBC – Internet failure that didn’t really happen

Once again the BBC’s ‘Timely, trusted tech news‘ is neither timely, nor can be trusted.
Yup. The Y2K ‘failure’ didn’t happen on the scale predicted Thomas Germain, so why even mention it?
The reason it didn’t happen, was because tens of thousands of software engineers such as myself, fixed code, so that it wouldn’t happen – something the BBC article studiously leaves out. That some companies, and indeed some authorities ignored what they had been told accounted for several failures.
Apparently Thomas regards train delays and misprinted jury summons as ‘trivial’ – that is only his point of view.

Wickipedia gives a reasonably accurate account of the reason why remediation was required. Year 2000 Problem
It also lists a considerable number of ‘falures’ where the problem hadn’t been fixed. An example:
In New York, a video store accidentally generated a $91,250 late fee because the store computer determined a tape rental was 100 years overdue.’ – It doesn’t mention whether the tape renter had a heart attack when he was given the bill.
The BBC article: Internet Outages

Cheesecake Verdict – The Ants Have It

Veredicto do Cheesecake – As Formigas Estão Comigo

Há dois dias, eu e a minha namorada provámos um cheesecake que comprei no LIDL. A cobertura era pelo menos comestível, mas infelizmente não consigo descrever o que eu e ela sentimos em relação à base sem usar alguns palavrões. Digamos que parece o que era: achatado. Coloquei o restante cheesecake no exterior, para perguntar às formigas o que achavam. Concordaram exatamente com a nossa opinião. A cobertura foi consumida, a base cuidadosamente ignorada.

[English]
Two days ago my girlfriend and I sampled a cheesecake I bought in LIDL. The topping was at least edible, unfortunately I can’t describe what her and I felt about the base, without using some profanity. Let’s just say it looks like what it was – flattened. I placed the remainder outside, to ask the ants what they thought about it. They concurred with our thoughts precisely. The topping was consumed, the base studiously ignored.

Thanks for Nothing Expatica, and Goodnight

Hi. Did a foray, in my search for a soulmate, as neither myself nor Mr/Mrs Snail, has had much luck lately.
This is a recent attempt with Expatica. Maybe my words are too long for the AI ‘inspector’ to understand?

Click on the image to see it correctly in your browser.
The error message reads:
Error: description not submitted. Please edit your description and resubmit for approval

My ‘description’ reads: “Hi, Despite the vagaries of age, I’m fit and well. Fun-loving and a little naughty.”

My answer to Expatica. “On your bike, and take your AI rubbish with you.

From The Sublime To The Ridiculous – The Raspberry Pi OS

Update 15th March 2025
It would seem that the ‘last straw’ for me was the dreadful ‘Bookworm 64-bit raspi OS’.
For existing projects, I’ve had to revert back to a so-called ‘legacy’ 32-bit version. At least there are ‘working’ versions of software I can actually use. I am NOT a ‘tinkerer’, I still develop software, and also write. I need something that ‘works’, not ‘might work when we fix it’.
Here’s a link that may interest, or even amuse, on the subject of Wayland. Wayland

Hi, Yes I’ve been here before, with comments regarding the ‘Pi-400’, the truly miserable quality of which was matched by Clive Sinclair’s BOS offerings some considerable time ago.
I have an early raspi board running ‘jessie’ which has given sterling service over many years hosting a local web server (wordpress) and a website interface to it.
Sad to say, every so-called ‘upgrade’ since, on other projects have reflected badly on the quality of the development. Upgrades fixed one problem and ‘broke’ code previously written.
Latterly. Raspberry Pi has become a ‘business’, with the typical mental mindset of ‘shove it out the door as fast as possible’, and ‘the users will find the bugs and fix them.’
The latest BAG OF SHIT ‘Bookworm 64-bit’ is nothing but that. Note I have not used my normal ‘polite’ abbreviation of ‘BOS’.
As the author of the very first language compiler for the BBC Micro, FORTH, and the same compiler on Acorn’s ARM 1, I’ve followed the ‘history’ very closely, and it has been a somewhat dreary ‘progress’ since.
Very recently, I did ‘burn’ a copy of ‘RISC OS’, a bad joke back then, and sat laughing at it. Almost nothing worked, as it had done on the old ‘Archie’.
Maybe Raspi Pi folks included it as a joke in their list of ‘alternatives’.
To be blunt the concept of ‘free’ software is blown out of the water, the cost in time (a very valuable commodity to me), frustration, et al, makes me give up.
I have two oldish Apple Macs, still giving fault-free performance, and will upgrade shortly. For now, Raspberry PI, it’s RIP.

SONOFF POW Mains Monitor

I’ll give my verdict first – a complete waste of time and money.
Yes, it’s a while since I purchased this thing and I’ve already referred to ‘Home Assistant’ – which if it was human, would have been dismissed forthwith.
So latterly I installed it. The first ‘hurdle’ is the so-called ‘User Manual’. I had to use a head-band magnifier to read it.
The 2nd ‘hurdle’ the connection diagram IS INCORRECT. Below a photo demonstrating both the almost unreadable text and the INCORRECT CONNECTION DIAGRAM. I’ve also laid an SD Card holder, to give an idea of scale.
Clicking on a photo DOES allow reading of the text due to the High-def pic taken with my old, but loved Agfa DC2030r 12 Megapixel camera.

Following this diagram will result in NO READINGS OTHER THAN ZERO.
Not surprising really, because the CT transformer needs to ENCLOSE ONLY ONE LEG OF THE MAINS SUPPLY, NOT TWO.
My photo below shows the CORRECT CONNECTION – only the ‘L’ leg of the supply going through the CT core.

On the left, is shown only the ‘L’ (Black in Portugal) leg of the mains connection inserted through the CT Transformer.

There are one or two conclusions that can be drawn from this experience.
NO-ONE has attempted to carry out the instructions provided. Primarily, because these are unreadable, and secondly it simply doesn’t work as stated.
This is so typical of the complete shit emanating from China.
Full of promise, complete failure to deliver.
‘Box-shifters’ like Robert Mauser here in Portugal, obviously trust the ‘CE’ given on these products, which are certified as such by the original supplier themselves. To me, ‘CE‘ inevitably signifies COMPLETE EXCREMENT.

And relax..

I can read the display, but I refuse to use the ‘Home Assistant’ crap. Instead I will use the device readings to calibrate my own design, which will be documented later in Tabuascasa

The Moussaka Affair

O Caso Moussaka.

Tuesday 24th Sept, 2024 @ 18:22

Tradução para português

A ‘different’ day.
It didn’t start that different. A ‘tidy’ up this morning, then an uneventful grocery shop.
As ‘light relief’ I had planned to cook a ‘moussaka’ – a meal I used to indulge in back on Tyneside at a lovely Greek restaurant in Newcastle.
Now my ‘chili con carne’ is not quite ‘world famous’, but still loved and enjoyed by friends. Based on my first seeing Keith Floyd rustle up this lovely dish many years ago, I have made it so many times it has become part of me.
So, I have thought often, what about a ‘few tweaks’ and making a Mousakka? A walk in the Park?

Armed with a couple of large Aubergines and 1Kg of minced beef I set to work, not to mention the accompaniment of Music and a box of ‘Silgueira’ – a rather tasty vinho tinto from Porto.

When the final dish was in the oven, I was almost exhausted. Never, ever, have I had to put so much effort into making, what, at first sight is simply a variant of ‘Lasagne Bolognesa’.

To be honest, I love to cook. Music, wine, creation – it has everything.
On this occasion it had too much of one thing, and a lack of something else – but what these two ‘components’ are, I really do not know..

I vaguely remember taking it out of the oven, switching off the oven, and pouring yet another glass of wine. Sat down in the kitchen, at the table, I was singing along to Barbara Dixon and Johnny Mathis.

Then I woke up. My bum was cramped, my ‘lunch’ was in front of me in a large dish, ready to be ‘served’ but now cooled to nearly cold, and an unfinished glass of wine in front of me.

Falling asleep on an upright chair, is something that has happened before on excursions into sublime oblivion. What surprises me, is why I never fall off.

Two, quite urgent ‘messages’ were apparent – one, I was cold, the other, damned hungry.
I closed the door, then cut, and removed a chunk of my masterpiece onto a plate.

Well, at least is was palatable. The beef, in my well-seasononed sauce was tasty. The rest? Least said, soonest mended.

The ‘few tweaks’ had become something of a marathon, only driven on by my enthusiasm, lovely music and ‘top-ups’ with excellent wine.

It was a bloody disaster..

Oh yes, I’ll eat it – bit by bit. But the attempt to recapture the lovely dish I’d had many years ago had failed – miserably.

Update Wednesday, 25/09/2024 @13:35
I have three favourite ‘R’s – Retribution, Redemption & Respite.

I’m keeping an open mind about this ‘dish’, and I’m only referring to the one I’ve already cooked.
Maybe after being portioned and frozen for a while, I might find them a little more appetizing..
I won’t repeat attempting the dish again, too much time and effort, for apparently scant reward.
Also I’d made too much ‘sauce’ for the two Aubergines, so a considerable quantity was left until this morning. Being for the mousakka, I’d reduced the water content with slow simmering, so the sauce was quite ‘thick’.
I decided to convert the substantial remainder into a ‘chili’. But hang on, that meant adding chopped-up malaguetas (my usual choice), or chili powder, either of which would need the remainder to be re-cooked again. I opted instead for a hot ‘piri-piri’ sauce from Makro’s ‘Professional’ range.
I use the latter on BBQ chicken etc., plus the ‘triturado’ for extra ‘oomph’.
So after adding a generous portion of red beans (fejao encarnado) I added some water, and some of the hot piri-piri sauce – no science, just my knowledge and experience with the BBQs.
So on a low heat, and a frequent stir, plus gob-fulls of my favourite ‘Dao’ red it was deemed ready for a taste-test.
A small spoonful was shoveled into my mouth. The minced beef was tender and tasty, and the strong taste delicious. That my nasal sense-organs signaled panic, there is no doubt – I sneezed powerfully.
After blowing my nose, then gulping more wine, the delicious taste lingered. ‘Wow!’ I thought, ‘that was bloody lovely!’. A little later another taste, this time with one of the beans included.
No sneeze, no eyes watering, just a sense of pleasure.
Essential – a ‘chili’ should always be accompanied by a ‘calming’ component. Pasta, Rice – even mashed boiled potato.
A little later, I scoffed a big helping, with Fusili pasta – lovely!

And the tree ‘R’s?
Retribution – For my ignorance.
Redemption – A by-product from the remainder that is truly lovely.
Respite – A full belly, and realization that all was not, indeed lost, plus a good laugh at myself..

The remainder of both dishes will be frozen. The labels on my ‘chilified’ version will be labelled ‘Beef and Red Beans in a Hot Piri-PIri Sauce.’

‘Kiss me Piri-Piri, kiss me,
Thrill me Piri-Piri thrill me.
Don’t care even if I blow my top,
But Piri Piri – ‘Uh-Huh?’
Don’t stop!

[With apologies to Shirley Bassey, Michael Julien, and Albon Timothy]
See her on Youtube: Shirley Bassey – Kiss Me, Honey, Honey.

Portuguesa

Um dia ‘diferente’.
Não começou assim tão diferente. Uma ‘arrumação’ esta manhã, depois uma mercearia sem incidentes.
Como “ligeiro alívio”, planeei preparar uma “moussaka” – uma refeição que costumava saborear em Tyneside, num adorável restaurante grego em Newcastle.
Ora o meu ‘chili con carne’ não é propriamente ‘mundialmente famoso’, mas não deixa de ser amado e apreciado pelos amigos. Com base na primeira vez que vi Keith Floyd preparar este adorável prato há muitos anos, já o fiz tantas vezes que se tornou parte de mim.
Assim, tenho pensado muitas vezes, que tal uns “alguns ajustes” e fazer um Mousakka? Um passeio no parque?

Munido de um par de Beringelas grandes e 1Kg de carne picada comecei a trabalhar, já para não falar do acompanhamento de Música e de uma caixa de ‘Silgueira’ – um saboroso vinho tinto do Porto.

Quando o prato final chegou ao forno, eu estava quase exausto. Nunca, nunca, tive de me esforçar tanto para fazer aquilo que, à primeira vista, é simplesmente uma variante da ‘Lasanha à Bolonhesa’.

Para ser sincero, adoro cozinhar. Música, vinho, criação – há de tudo.
Nesta ocasião, havia muito de uma coisa e faltava outra – mas o que são estes dois “componentes”, não sei bem.

Lembro-me vagamente de o tirar do forno, desligá-lo e servir mais um copo de vinho. Sentei-me na cozinha, à mesa, a cantar ao som de Barbara Dixon e Johnny Mathis.

Então acordei. O meu rabo estava com cãibras, o meu “almoço” estava à minha frente num prato grande, pronto para ser “servido”, mas agora arrefecido quase frio, e um copo de vinho inacabado à minha frente.

Adormecer numa cadeira vertical é algo que já aconteceu anteriormente em excursões ao esquecimento sublime. O que me surpreende é porque nunca caio.

Duas ‘mensagens’ bastante urgentes eram aparentes – uma, estava com frio, a outra, com muita fome.
Fechei a porta, cortei e coloquei um pedaço da minha obra-prima num prato.

Bem, pelo menos era palatável. A carne, no meu molho bem temperado, estava saborosa. O resto? Menos dito, mais rápido corrigido.

Os “alguns ajustes” tornaram-se uma espécie de maratona, impulsionados apenas pelo meu entusiasmo, música adorável e “recargas” com excelente vinho.

Foi um desastre sangrento..

Ah, sim, vou comê-lo – pouco a pouco. Mas a tentativa de recuperar o prato adorável que comi há muitos anos falhou – redondamente.

Atualização quarta-feira, 25/09/2024 às 13h35
Tenho três ‘R’s favoritos – Retribuição, Redenção e Trégua.

Estou de mente aberta em relação a este ‘prato’, e refiro-me apenas ao que já preparei.
Talvez depois de serem repartidos e congelados durante algum tempo, possa achá-los um pouco mais apetitosos.
Não voltarei a repetir a tentativa do prato, muito tempo e esforço, por uma recompensa aparentemente escassa.
Além disso, fiz demasiado “molho” para as duas beringelas, pelo que sobrou uma quantidade considerável para esta manhã. Sendo para o mousakka, reduzi o teor de água com uma fervura lenta, pelo que o molho ficou muito “espesso”.
Decidi converter o restante substancial em ‘chili’. Mas espere, isso significava adicionar malaguetas picadas (a minha escolha habitual) ou pimenta em pó, qualquer um dos quais precisaria que o resto fosse cozinhado novamente. Optei por um molho picante ‘piri-piri’ da linha ‘Professional’ da Makro.
Eu uso este último em frango de churrasco, etc., mais o ‘triturado’ para ‘energia’ extra.
Assim, depois de adicionar uma generosa porção de feijão vermelho, acrescentei um pouco de água e um pouco do molho picante de piri-piri – sem ciência, apenas o meu conhecimento e experiência com churrascos.
Depois, em lume brando e mexendo frequentemente, para além do meu tinto ‘Dao’ favorito, foi considerado pronto para um teste de sabor.
Uma pequena colherada foi colocada na minha boca. A carne picada estava tenra e saborosa, e o sabor forte, delicioso. Que os meus órgãos sensoriais nasais sinalizaram pânico, não há dúvida – espirrei com força.
Depois de se assoar e beber mais vinho, o sabor delicioso manteve-se. ‘Uau!’ Pensei, ‘isto foi adorável!’. Um pouco mais tarde outra prova, desta vez com um dos feijões incluído.
Sem espirros, sem olhos lacrimejantes, apenas uma sensação de prazer.
Essencial – um ‘chili’ deve ser sempre acompanhado por um componente ‘calmante’. Massa, Arroz – até puré de batata cozida.
Um pouco depois, gozei com uma dose generosa, com massa Fusili – que delícia!

E a árvore ‘R’s?
Retribuição – Pela minha ignorância.
Redenção – Um subproduto do resto que é verdadeiramente adorável.
Tréguas – Uma barriga cheia e a perceção de que nem tudo estava, de facto, perdido, para além de uma boa gargalhada de mim próprio.

O restante de ambos os pratos será congelado. Os rótulos da minha versão ‘chilificada’ serão rotulados como ‘Carne e feijão vermelho em molho picante Piri-PIri’.

‘Beija-me Piri-Piri, beija-me,
Emocione-me Piri-Piri emocione-me.
Não me importo mesmo que exploda,
Mas Piri Piri – ‘Uh-Hã?’
Não pare!

[Com os nossos pedidos de desculpa a Shirley Bassey, Michael Julien e Albon Timothy]
Veja-a no Youtube: Shirley Bassey – Kiss Me, Honey, Honey.

IB50 – Big Brother Bombast or Bureaucratic Bullshit?

This is a copy of a post I formerly published on another of my websites, some considerable time ago.
It demonstrates quite clearly the offhand and demeaning treatment to anyone in the UK who is on the ‘radar’ of the UK’s so-called Benefit system.
It also demonstrates the patently obvious poor quality of employees who ‘manned’ the telephones purporting to give ‘help’ and ‘assistance’ to the general public.

The poor individual I spoke to, had no idea that I was recording our conversation, but having had to put up with stupidity and ignorance before with these folks, I was determined to capture exactly, what was said between us. He was also unaware of what lay in wait for him, as I have to admit here, that I knew exactly what I wanted to ask, having ascertained what I was entitled to.
My ‘interviewing’ technique may seem a little cruel to others, but in all honesty, I actually enjoyed his all-too-apparent discomfort, naughty of me I know. In retrospect, here was an individual who should never have been placed into a public-facing role.

BBBombast

Carvalheira Archery Centre

My much-vaunted Grand Opening of the Carvalheira Archery Range was today. After great expense, and the splendid support of neighbours, the day itself turned out to be a fairly low-key affair.

Let me re-phrase that, it’s been a total flop.

Fatima, down at Miranda’s Town Hall, had promised me support, but neither her nor any other council officers attended. In fact, I’m beginning to wonder just exactly what she was promising, when I spoke to her last week.
Maybe my study of Colloquial Portuguese should be broadened in
scope to cover local Portuguese expletives.

Two of the neighbours did turn up, but appeared to misunderstand the purpose behind my fixing of balloons onto the target, and insisted on pawing these until each one burst in turn. Also, once I began my shooting display, they decided they had more important things to do, and left quite abruptly.

I blame the rain. Yes, I said rain. It’s taken 23 days, but it’s finally tracked me down after following my trail all the way from North Shields.

There was a warning. Last night outside the cafe in Tabuas, I had to jump onto the table to stop it taking off and making an unscheduled landing somewhere over in Penela, it’s attached umbrella suddenly animated with a gust of wind appearing from nowhere.

Joaquim came out to clear up the mess of broken glass, looked up at the sky and said simply:
“Chuva – amanha.”
He was dead right.

The Range

The Range

The Grand Pavilion

The Grand Pavilion

Cleanest Teeth In Town?

Cleanest Teeth In Town?

Cleanest Teeth In Town?

Since he missed his last dental appointment, José Falcão’s Hygienist showed determination in carrying out her appointed task,  despite very difficult circumstances.

Update: 16th September 2012

As I’ve always said, in a massively-parallel world, co-incidence is the norm, so why act so surprised?

I would be sticking my neck out (though not, it seems as much as Senhor Falcão can) to suggest that the town council of Miranda Do Corvo, read my blog yesterday and said: “Dash it all chaps, we must replace José’s missing plaque.”

No. So I’ll just report that they caught the offending Dental Hygienist still scrubbing it up with grade 3 dental paste.
They liked the contrast with the original Bronze head so much, they decided to replace it as is.

Plaque is back

Plaque is back